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Sign up for shopittome.com's "Sale Mail." They'll e-mail you when brands you've chosen have gone on sale in your size and in your area. Once I accepted that women were "crazy" (many older guys had insisted they were for years), it seemed to take a huge load of pressure off me.

No longer was I trying to rationalize moves that women made that got me into crazy analysis cycles.

Alcohol should be introduced into the relationship slowly, but if a drink or two takes the edge off, and wine adds romance it's fine. But the one thing that should never happen is excessive application: too much, too many colors, or if it's just a botched attempt at a good makeup technique.

Seems like as time goes by, makeup makes like the earth and erodes and changes with weathering.

The best thing to do is to act like you have some experience, and not question anything.

I think back to the advice my dad once gave my sisters and me when he snuck us onto the "premium members only" tennis courts at this fancy resort at the beach.

It's nice to hear nothing but your lover's breath against the backdrop of the evening or early morning.

In fact, we've most likely made it to this point in spite of my mouth.

This may explain why we are so clueless at what we are doing in bed, but we act like we know. Some people turn into a completely different person when they are drunk.

Let the other person learn about you while you're sober, before you get wasted with them. I've always been the type of guy who appreciates a natural look as it is, and when a girl does her makeup well, the results can be magical.

But what's even lamer: when some outsider tries to use the language, without the ability to contribute. My friends and I would discuss how she was trying to speak like us, and it got to the point where I bristled every time I heard her speak one of our made-up words. Make sure you cater what you wear to what you're doing. I make myself look really picky and difficult to get to.

I try not to make a girl walk too much if she's in heels. The sea is very romantic, but I would be too nervous the entire time. While walking in the ocean I've stepped on some unidentified crustaceous creatures and we've both scuttled along away from one another in fear. Then, I get really tender and give all of my attention to this girl who thought she had no chance.