To get to the bottom of this, I spoke with 14 relationship and love experts about the things they see come up the most in relationships — and what they advise you to do when such issues pop up, so you don't have to be tormented and troubled for too long.
You don't have to grin and bear it; on the contrary, everyone has triggers, and when they show their ugly heads in relationships, if you pause and address the concerns immediately, you have a way better chance at resolving the whole thing peacefully."You love the big romantic gestures and your partner is more low-key — that will trigger conflict." But you can work it out if you tell them what you need."Your partner is not a mind reader, so be clear and concise with your expectations," Carver says."Throw in a dash of reality too: If your partner is shy, than the big splash may not happen, or if your partner likes creating 'moments' and you cringe, then just don't hint what you want — say it out loud to them.""A big trigger than comes up in relationship is the limitations we put on ourselves in setting boundaries," Darren Pierre, educator, speaker and author of The Invitation to Love: Recognizing the Gift Despite Pain, Fear, and Resistance , tells Bustle.Tell your partner how it feels."With all of the holidays — Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's — all coming up in a few months, a lot of anxiety of how you plan to spend the holidays comes up," Stefanie Safran, Chicago's "Introductionista" and founder of Stef and the City, tells Bustle."Before you get anxiety, you need to have talks about expectations and needs for what you need in your relationship." If you want to spend Thanksgiving with your partner's family, discuss it.