However I often find myself criticizing successful black men who seem to only date white women.
I know it seems quite a hypocritical position to take (pot calling the kettle black!
It's almost like God is trying to tell us something. _______________________ Washington, DC: Can you speak a little about how to ignore the criticism you get for dating outside your race?
) - but I wonder if those relationships - on the meta-level - do not perpetuate some of the racialized myths your book seems to discredit. The white wife as the ultimate marker of achieving success?
With black educated women outpacing black men 3 to 1, what leads black men to choose a white woman over a black woman? I often struggle to articulate this critique, when I think on a micro-level it is hard to criticize anyone's relationship - just as those who stand jeering on the sidelines of interracial relationships miss what is special there.
But I also think there is something to be said about the way in which gender, stereotypes and our nation's history (where black boys were lynched for looking at white women) has impacted the makeup of black/white relationships. There were actually quite a few women I interviewed for Don't Bring Home A White Boy who expressed your exact sentiments: they resented black men with white wives.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic and thank you for sharing your work! However, for most of them, once they were in a serious relationship of their own, they found themselves to be far less concerned with what black men were doing.