Why do noble people have few friends?
These 7 signs show you have fake friends
As is well known, friends are like the stars - you can't always see them, and yet they are always there. At least in the ideal case. But not all of the people around us are the friends we would like to think of them to be. Due to increasing digital networking, fast-paced communication and modern living conditions, which are associated with frequent moves and new beginnings, especially for young people, a large number of people who we would like to call our friends, unfortunately romp around in the course of our lives however, among them again and again false friends. But who of them really deserves this designation and which friendships we should perhaps better give up because of their toxic character, we'll tell you here:
1. Give and take is mutual - friends take that to heart!
Friendships should do one thing above all else: do us good. In order for this to work, everyone involved must bring about the same level of commitment to the friendship. In plain English, this means: give and take are reciprocal! False friends show a big deficit here. They only get involved in a relationship as long as they themselves benefit from it. But as soon as you ask for something in return, for example listening attentively in difficult life situations or assistance with specific problems, they are deaf to you and your worries. If you also frequently have the feeling that you are just an "emergency nail" or you feel like the "fifth wheel" on the car, especially in a group, then you are clearly out of place in this friendship. Separate yourself from such people and look for people who have an ear and a heart for you and your worries and who would like to spend time with you, even if they have no grief to complain about.
2. With a good friend, you feel understood
Do you feel understood by your boyfriend or girlfriend? Do you have the feeling that you can tell them everything about yourself - even things that you would not confide in anyone? Then your friendship is real! Because he or she accepts you for who you are and you acknowledge that by rewarding them with your trust. On the other hand, if you have many secrets from your friends and the feeling that there are many things that they cannot understand you, then your friendship is probably not too deep. You can't even blame them for that. Not everyone suits everyone. Nevertheless, you should take the time and freedom to look out for people who share your attitude towards life and with whom you can also speak openly about private matters.
3. A good friendship does not have two faces
Friends stick to each other even when the other is not even there. Of course, you don't have to agree on all things, but friends shouldn't talk badly about each other, especially when dealing with third parties. If you hear that someone is talking disparagingly about you behind your back, this should be a clear warning sign for you! Talk to the other person about it and ask them to clear the table if there is something that bothers them about you. You can take his answer to heart, but you shouldn't be compelled to change just to please someone else. Because if a true friend has a "problem" with you, he will address it to you personally and not drag on you behind your back.
4. Envy doesn't stop you from doing anything
Envy is not a nice trait, but it is still human. At work, in particular, one likes to look at other people's lives with unintentionally envious eyes. But that should never prevent true friends from promoting one another and strengthening one another's goals and ambitions. Because they support you in your growth and want you to realize your dreams - even if that means that you might soon overtake them on the career ladder. They grant you your success and are honestly happy for you!
5. Small missteps are forgivable, but not in the long run
As is well known, experience makes you smart. This does not only apply to small children who burn their fingers on the stove. You too should consider whether you have already suffered a scar or two in your friendship. If a friend has lied to or cheated on you repeatedly, you shouldn't let them get away with it. It starts with small things such as frequent cancellations for joint appointments or repeatedly forgotten birthdays. See if you can understand the reasons your friend can provide for the failure. Friends with children, for example, are naturally always a little more restricted. Nevertheless, the measure will be full at some point.
6. Nobody should humiliate you - especially no friend!
We all like to make a joke now and then that is at the expense of others. But that's only funny as long as nobody feels seriously hurt or humiliated by it. If one of your friends makes jokes about you frequently and hits you emotionally, ask them to stop. A good friend will do this without difficulty, because he doesn't want to upset or hurt you, he just wants to enjoy a good time with you. If, on the other hand, he finds it difficult not to continue exposing you in front of others, then that is a clear sign that he is trying to undermine your self-esteem. For him you are little more than a podium on which he can put himself in the limelight.
7. The most important thing in everything: Always be yourself!
Some people induce us to behave in a way that does not look like us at all. Under certain circumstances, that can be a good thing: For example, some friends manage to motivate us and inspire us to perform that we alone thought would be unattainable. But there are other friends too. Namely, those that encourage us to behave badly: They blaspheme others and make us participate. They tempt us to drink, smoke or do other things that we don't really want to do. You should part with such friends as soon as possible. They only cause harm in the long run.
Get rid of false friends: that's how it works
Sometimes it is not that easy to break away from fake friends. After all, you have spent a lot of time together and certainly share some wonderful moments and memories. But when you notice that your friendship is no longer good for you and you suffer from it, it is time to draw a line.
The person may initially be angry at your decision to cut the contact. She may not understand your reasons, or she may be hurt by losing herself as a friend. However, if you do not see insight or an apology from the other person, then you know that you have made the right decision to break away from them.
Don't be afraid of losing a friend or being alone afterwards. Because what good is a friendship in which you constantly feel uncomfortable and misunderstood? It is better to focus on a few people in your life who really care about you, rather than having a large circle of friends, with people who might want to be friends with you for the wrong reasons. And there will always be new people in your life, with whom a real friendship can develop.
Here are a few more inspiring sayings and quotes on the subject of false friends:
- False friends believe rumors. Real friends believe in you.
- There are no fake friends - just fake people pretending to be your friends.
- Wrong people always have to preserve their image. Honest people just don't care.
- You can tell the true character of a person by how he treats you when he no longer needs you.
- False people are a necessary evil in order to know the true friends.
- While some make you feel like you are never enough, others show you that you are unique and important.
- Wrong people come and go. True friends stay forever.
Photo: CoffeeAndMilk / Getty Images
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